...Post-Wedding Review Part 1 - Thank You...

It’s been a while since I wrote for fun. I guess that happens when you earn from writing about different stuff – you choose to spend time writing a piece that could earn you money than write for the sake of writing.

Today, and probably the next few days, I will waste my time writing for the sake of writing because I’m happy. I am, after all, a married man now. In this first part of the series of blogs I am about to make, I want to express my gratitude to the people dear to me the best way that I can - through writing. Later, I’d share my wedding day experience and my reviews of our suppliers to help provide insights for those who are planning to get married. I personally relied on some reviews over the internet in preparation for our wedding, and hopefully, these reviews could help those who are almost there to prepare for their big day.

First of all, thank you to everyone’s well-wishes. It fills my heart with joy to know that we are loved by so many. As I start a new life in a new home, I leave my home country with too many people I care about. While it pains me not to be that guy you could call on anytime, I need to choose me this time. This blog is for all of you who I will dearly miss, and look forward to meeting again whenever I visit or when we decide to return home.  

To Che, my lovely wife, sinabi ko naman sa ‘yo noon, na pangarap ko lang naman ay maging tatay sa magiging anak natin. Salamat, at naka-isang hakbang na tayo patungo sa direksyong iyon. I chose you because I chose me. I can let go of everyone else I love to build a new life in a new home because growing old with you is what matters to me most. I love you.

To Mama, thank you for all your support. Our wedding may not have run as smoothly without you constantly being at our side. Thank you for opening up to me, and trusting me with your burdens, as it has helped me aspire to become the kind of man who would not put those burdens on anyone else.

To Papa, thank you being our provider and our model. I would not have become the kind of man that I am today if not for the perspectives you have shared through the years. You have molded me into a balanced man – emotional, but sometimes stoic, impulsive, but always practical. I have been able to enjoy life to its fullest, because you taught me to always choose to be happy. ‘Ika mo nga, “wala namang problema sa mundo, ikaw lang ang nagbibigay ng problema.”

To Ate, thank you for always having an open ear, and for trusting me to have the same. Your little bundle of joy in Khail has been a source of happiness for all of us. I will see more of you here in Singapore.

To Job, thank you for looking up to me. You have given me reason to feel cool even though I grew up as a nerd. I sincerely hope that I turned out to be a good role model for you, and I promise to strive to be better so that I can give you more guidance as we grow older.

To Jon, my cousin, my brother from another mother, thank you for being who we turned out to be. You have helped me realize what growing up is – our early childhood rivalry became a deep friendship that spanned angry girlfriends, a car to motorcycle accident, cooking lessons and countless other memories. Kung mabibisita ko lang yung 13 at 14 years old na tayo at sinabi kong ganito tayo ngayon baka namura at nagulpi ako nung dalawang yun. If there’s anything that I regret about our relationship, it’s that we weren’t able to cultivate it early enough. Know that I will always have a bottle to share with you whenever I visit home, and I will always have one ready when you visit me here.

To the Lozada Family, thank you for being a happy bunch of people to grow up with. I have you to thank for all the friends that have grown to love me, because if not for you, I may have just been a nerd who never spoke much. You have taught me to learn how to laugh at myself, and how to appreciate people no matter where they come from. You have taught me to always see the best in people, but also helped me learn to become a good judge of character. Thank you, Lolo Upoy and Lola Nena for raising these people well. Thank you to my cousins, who gave me a colorful childhood. Thank you Tita Men, Tita Gong, and Tita Jean, for helping Lolo and Lola raise your brothers and sisters. Thank you Tita Bem and Tito Nandy, for being as strong as you are when you still lived. I know you are watching over us from the heavens. Thank you, Auntie Ne, for being a stern but loving aunt to us all from childhood until now. Thank you, Tito, for being always being available to help. Thank you, Uncle Jer, for the carefree camaraderie that made me comfortable with just about anyone. Thank you, Tito Vic, because of your calm life lessons in random drinking nights. Thank you, Uncle Owe, for both fun and serious talks, for messages of both precaution and hope. Thank you, Uncle Jun, for all the life lessons and all your efforts to bring this huge family together. Thank you, Tita Oyes, for being the most kikay balahura tita that I have. Believe me, that is a compliment. I love you all.

To the Coo family, thank you for being a welcoming bunch to be with. Thank you Amah and Ang Kong for raising your children to become the people they are now. Please don’t hurry joining Ang Kong, Amah, and just enjoy the rest of your life without stressing out about everything you don’t need to. Thank you Tito Edwin and Tita Anna, for everything you have done to help shape me to become the professional that I am now, for trusting me with everything that you did. I only hope that I was able to fill the shoes I needed to fill. Thank you, Nic, Auds, and Erika, for being my little sisters while I was working with your dad. You are awesome, and I will miss our Saturday lunches talking about random stuff. Thank you, Uncle Hero and Tita Nene, for being a constant source of inspiration. Mama shares your difficulties with me, and I am always amazed at how you both managed to overcome the challenges that came your way. To Hil and Hux, thank you for becoming as humble as you both are. It speaks of the kind of people your parents are, but not everyone can have the character to choose to become who you both are today. Thank you Tita Emy, for being someone Mama can speak to when she feels that no one understands her. I only hope that things get better for you. Thank you, Richard and Philipp, for being older brothers I could look up to when our cousins were still little, and I wasn’t used to being a kuya yet. Thank you AJ, Ate Let Let and Shobe, for keeping in touch throughout the years. Thank you Tita Evelyn, for all the patience you have given Amah. Thank you, Kuya David, for being a connection to home for Ate along with Richard here in Singapore. Thank you, Ate Dabie and Ate Daisy, for always making an effort to connect our families through momentous events of your kids.

To Team Flow, my brothers, thank you for welcoming me into your circle even though I spent much of my time in college with other people. I still hope that our kids grow up together, because I know my kids will grow up in great company with yours. Tian, nasabi ko na gusto ko sabihin sa yo nung gabing bago ako umalis. Benj and Carin, thank you for being an inspiration in making things and decisions work. Kali and Eekay, stay happy. Imon and Ella, choose to be happy. Jan, choose. Rey, decide. I will miss being with you all.

To the Familia – Kuya Ags, Ate Puch, Ate Len, Tring, Ate Pat, and Nico – thank you for not losing touch. To Kuya Ags and Ate Puch, thank you for believing in me since my first year in college. You have no idea how much you have built my confidence through the years. To Tring, thank you for introducing Nino. I have nothing left to say to you. Joke lang :p haha… Thank you for being the sweetest little sister in our family. To Ate Len, mamaya ka. To Ate Pat and Nico, we miss you. J

To the Happy Friends - named as such because of always being happy, and because at one point yun ang pangalan ng chat thread - thank you for the happiness. To Sof, Ernestine, and Len, thank you for being my ates when Che and I split up. Nagsarado man ang buong Ortigas Depot at ang roofdeck natin, walang makakabawi ng mga alaala natin dun. Salamat sa mga luha at tawa ni Ernestine, sa mga praktikal na bilin ni Sof, at sa kalmado at minsang supladang mga pananaw ni Len. Ang masasabi ko lang, “muwah!” Thank you, Josef, for all our isolation moments to talk about basketball even if the ates are there. Thank you Ate I for insightful perspectives and writing rakets. Thank you, Chip (kabertdey!), for being a wonderful husband that my dearest Ate Sof deserves. Thank you, Katrina, for Mark. Hahaha.. joke lang :p Thank you for being a fun loving person I pictured you to be when Sof an EJ were telling me stories about you. Thank you, peys, Perk and Ken, for always being the life of the parties. Sana makasama ako sa susunod na Christmas party.

To my SDP family, thank you for being the organization that introduced Che and I. More than that, thank you for making me feel that I mattered, for valuing me in more ways than one. For the friendship and trust, thank you to all my kuyas - Kuya Jeff, Kuya Christ, Kuya Chito, Kuya Ren, Kuya Mark, Kuya Chan – for always being there to guide me in my early years in college. To all my ates – Ate Joy, Ate Maita, Ate Jean, and many more that I may fail to remember right now – thank you for believing in me and what I could do. To SDP batch 2006, thank you for adopting me as if I was your own. To SDP batch 2007 – thank you for an unbreakable bond that has helped us remain friends to this day and beyond. To the younger batches, thank you for the respect that you honored me with.

To my basketball buddies – the guys from Solar, Papawis Weekly crew of Mack, Holiday and Random Basketball practices organized by Marlowe, Pasig Friday Basketball care of Totz, and Thursday Night Lights care of Reg – thank you for accepting me into your circle. I may not be the best ball player out there, but thank you for letting me enjoy my passion for the sport by playing my heart out with you guys. I can only hope that I meet people who are half as good as you guys here in SG.

I may have missed out on some people; I know because I met so many people along the way. I would add them later if need be, but for now, these people need to know how much I am grateful to have them in my life.

I will build new relationships here in Singapore, but know that I will always treasure you all for the rest of my life. I hope to see you all again soon!

...Our Story: Some Random Ramblings Inspired by "Tadhana"...

On my social media feeds, I either read about praises, reposted blogs, or insults about "That Thing Called Tadhana."

With no regard for any of that, I personally loved that film. When One More Chance came out, I was at an age where people could easily relate to the situations presented. So relatable in fact, that we almost thought the story of one of my couple friends (broken up then, but married now) inspired the flick.

"Tadhana" doesn't pick up on the story of the movie. It picked up ON the movie, pretty much like how some lonely hearts (and not so lonely hearts like myself) watch it over and over just because, si John Lloyd yun eh, tagos.

Inspired by the movie and the month of hearts, I dust off my personal blog to share some random musings brought about by the movie, looking back at past experiences that may have crossed my mind while I was watching it.

(May contain spoilers for the movie. Must not discourage you from still watching it. I'd watch it again.)

On Heartbreak

Videoke is an awesome outlet of heartbreak.
(Image from: http://www.wheninmanila.com/that-thing-called-tadhana-hugot-overload-we-can-all-relate-to/) 

My fiancee and I broke up around five years into our relationship. She said she "needed to find herself," so imagine my laughter when Mace broke out that line. "Burgis," Anthony called her.

It hurt like hell because I didn't know what I did wrong. After the initial shock and tears, we got back to how we were used to, albeit some changes. I wasn't as submissive as before, as I didn't think I needed to go shopping with her. I mean, what guy can stand shopping with a girl if he doesn't need to? Still, we would go out to dinner at times (mostly with our eternal third wheel and future "Best Girl" - title subject to change) and I'd still take her home as if nothing happened. Well, I did talk to her dad about us breaking up.

Considering this, the events that happened next were pretty bad on my part.

I met a girl through a friend, in a birthday of another friend who's in our closely-knit group. She was, I thought, the embodiment of my ideal girl. We went on a couple of dates, and in between I saw my fiancee (my ex at the time) for dinners and even a  (group) movie date. After one of those dinners was the coldest conversations I've had with someone:

Me: Gusto mo pa bang maging tayo ulit?

Her: Um... oo.

Me: Ako kasi, ayoko na. 

Then I went on to explain how I met this girl and stuff. Of course, that did not go well. She proceeded to tell me that we shouldn't be talking anymore, that we shouldn't be having those dinners, and it would be best to cut off all communication and our social media ties. I did, because it was the least I could do for her after what I told her.

The other girl knew that I just came out of a five-year relationship. Our friends told her about it. I told her that it's also why I am a bit hesitant to make any move. She told me that the best way to forget someone is to meet someone new.

I disagreed. I didn't want to forget. I wanted to make new memories. We can't "forget" people. They came into our lives to help shape who we are as individuals. She was a big part of my life, and this new girl is someone I liked because I did, and not just because I wanted to forget.

She eventually went back abroad, as she only came here to visit. She eventually decided she didn't want another long distance relationship, and ended whatever form of communication we had.

It hurt, sure. Did I want to forget her? Of course not. But I did want to move on from her.

On Moving On

I have reason to believe that Popoy invented this rule.
(Image from: http://www.wattpad.com/33311641-the-3-month-rule-a-blog-broken)

People confuse "moving on" and wanting to "forget" someone. I think it's why so many people fail at moving on; they focus on wanting to forget when what they should be doing is accepting the reality that's staring right at them.

Mace did it in the movie. She was hurt badly by her John Lloyd look-a-like boyfriend, and did everything she could to forget him. Ultimately, she couldn't even say a word when Anthony said he was going.

I didn't throw away five years of our relationship down the drain when I met another girl during that post-breakup stage of our relationship. I valued it so much that I didn't want to make the same mistakes I did that might have pushed her away. I didn't forget her. I treasured all the memories we had together, and honored her by drinking from two straws as she always did.

Even for a short while, I was struck by the other girl. My basic Facebook stalking skills led me to discover that upon cutting all social media ties, she already had a boyfriend. It surprisingly hurt pretty bad, but it was easier to move on from her at the time.

Moving on means getting on with your life. I'm not saying you shouldn't be hurt because of a break up, all I'm saying is there's no "right" time to move on. In One More Chance, it's three months. In Tadhana, it didn't matter, as long as you forget.

I don't think you can ever forget someone. However, it will be up to you when you're ready to accept the fact that what's done is done so that you could move on with your life. It doesn't have to be with another person, it could be just by yourself. Never think that happiness is dependent on another person.

If you try too hard to find love, you probably wouldn't find it. You might even be blinded by your desperation that you'd fail to see the intentions of someone. When you start loving yourself, you get to enjoy life, and having someone come along will just be a bonus.

On Fate

Thinking, looking, and hoping will lead to nowhere.
(Image credit: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/alex-furmansky/top-5-ways-to-get-back-in_b_3901033.html)

It was a fun time when I was single. The pain inspired me to write some of the blogs I'd like to re-read. I had a lot of free time I spent with friends. I worried about nothing.

I forgot how my ex and I got back to talking again. Maybe it's because of a blog we each wrote that seemed similar to each other. The point is, we got to talk again. Was it fate?

As romantic as the idea of fate is, I don't think it's as predestined as we think it is. We're not "meant" for anyone, we make ourselves believe that we are. Fate, I think, is like horoscopes and personality tests; we just associate what we learn from it with our experiences.

Fate is the romantic equivalent of chance or luck. You're walking around and pick up a piece of paper to throw in the trash can, then realize it's a 1000-peso bill. You say it's luck. Anthony sees a fellow Pinoy trying to fit her stuff in her luggage and approaches her to help, leading to the whole trip that would make the movie.Why does that have to be fate? Can't it also be luck?

She's lucky he went along with him and didn't take advantage of her misery. He's lucky to have had the purest intentions and had the girl trust that he did. It's a story of luck, but it's more appealing to call it "fate" or "tadhana."

Fate is what we want to believe it is. In this age of social media, how many overly romantic couples have you seen profess their love for their "one true love" or "destiny" only to see them break up a few months after? Fate-fate tapos pag hiwalay na, kelangan sumigaw sa Sagada para makalimot?

Mace said it best in the movie:

“Alam mo yung sabi nila na “Kapag kayo, kayo talaga.” Tangina, nakaka-gago yun. Bakit ko iaasa ‘yon sa isang bagay na hindi ko naman nakikita? Kung mahal mo, ipaglaban mo. Habulin mo. Gawin mong lahat para bumalik siya sa’yo.” 

Romantic flicks can sell us the idea of fate. However, in reality, the best fate can do is bring people together. What happens next is is totally up to the people involved.

There wouldn't be a movie if Anthony didn't come up to Mace. Most romantic flicks we watch usually end with "happily ever after," giving viewers the idea that they'll live a perfect life. There's is no perfect life like some movies would like us to believe, much like it's impossible to believe that from the airport in Rome to their trip to Sagada Anthony and Mace didn't have to take a trip to the crapper.

Everyone's happy the first time they get together with someone. Don't find the "perfect" partner who has no flaws for your "happily ever after." Find the partner who makes you happy but whose flaws you're willing to accept.

On Making It Work

The two people involved in the relationship should work together for it to work.
(Image from: http://rebloggy.com/post/gif-love-relationship-couple-gifs-black-and-white-movie-hands-hand-my-posts-ho/33440179246)

When we got back together, I think we were less mushy but more realistic. We weren't teenagers wanting to go against all odds, we were a young couple enjoying the fruits of our labor. There were no more twice-a-month monthsaries like we used to have back when we first got together, I even forgot the exact date we actually got back together.

What was important was we were together again. We knew each other better, because we had the chance to get to know our own selves better.

Two years after getting back together, she wanted to break up again for the same reason she wanted to break up before; space. No matter what semantics was used, it was the same.

The length of a relationship shouldn't keep you from staying in it if you can't make it work. As in the movie, Mace's eight year relationship ended with just seven words. Kung wala na, wala na. Pwedeng ipaglaban, pero kung hindi na kayang lumaban nung isa, tama na.

Seven years into the relationship, we're back to where we were when we were at our five year mark. I couldn't understand it. Unlike the first time when I hurt her, I didn't give her the opportunity to decide our future on her own.

Me: Gusto mo pa bang maging tayo?
Her: (nods head)
Me: Pwes, wag mong gawin to. Pag ayaw mo na, tama na. Wag mong sabihing ayaw mo na pero aasa ka pa rin na magkakabalikan pa tayo. Bitaw kung bitaw. Kung gusto mo pa, then let's make this work. 

Since that day, we've made it work.

I'd be lying if I said that the length of the relationship didn't play a role in wanting to keep it. More than that though, I stayed with her that long because I wanted to grow old with her. She wanted a future with me too, and that was reason enough for me to fight for our relationship.

Relationships are a two-way street. While it's good that one of the two is submissive, that one can't always give way. Of course you need to make your relationship work, but if the other party isn't putting in as much effort, pagpapakatanga na yan.

On Taking the Next Step

Of course, we all want the better love story.
(Image from: https://www.pinterest.com/explore/humor-relationship-quotes/)

Mace confessed that she was only waiting for her boyfriend of eight years to pop the question, and she would've let everything go for him. He didn't, insisting that he's working for their future. Eventually she decided to surprise him, only to be surprised herself with what she found out.

When our friends were getting married around us, my girlfriend was vocal about wanting to settle down as well. I was vocal in insisting that I wasn't ready because we weren't ready. I told her that she could look for someone else if she already wanted to get married because I sure wasn't, considering our lifestyle and her dreams.

I've been blessed to have had someone like her. She wanted to do so much in her life, but always thought about us in her decisions. After years of holding back, she finally got the courage to pursue one of her dreams; making it in another country.

Long distance relationships don't usually work. Talking about how long the other person will be away is not the way to go because those deadlines aren't usually followed. One of you has to be ready to leave everything behind to be with the other, because at some point, there will be a need for it.

Mace was at a stalemate with her boyfriend because she had a promising career she didn't want to leave here, while her boyfriend's contract was extended in Rome. She said she was ready if he popped the question, but he didn't.

It makes sense for her to not let go of her own career, if only for the possibility that her boyfriend would leave her. We go back to the earlier point about loving yourself - your happiness shouldn't be dependent on another.

I'm in a pretty stable job here. She was too. But she wanted to do so much more. I didn't want to hold her back, so I let her go. I didn't let her go in the "kung kayo, kayo" sense, nor was it in the "8 years naman na kami" way that Mace thought. I saw it more as another step in our relationship than a challenge to it.

Once she had her feet planted there, I needed to prepare myself to let go of what I have. It's not that I'm less driven, but I recognize the better opportunity. I do have passions I want to pursue myself, but settling down was a bigger priority for me. I couldn't do that with her just telling me about her dreams. She needed to do it. And when she did, I felt that we were ready.

I didn't want to end up in a stalemate. I decided to be with her even if it meant leaving everything else behind. I asked for her hand on the night of November 27, 2014.

I'm thankful that we got this far. I'm optimistic that we'll go further. I wanted to grow old with her, and we're taking our next steps in achieving that dream.

Happy Valentine's Day :)

...Classifying "Fans"...

We are in the midst of an awesome Finals rematch of two of the best teams in the NBA right now. Through these next few days, expect bickering and constant trash talking among fans. However, as a follower of sports, I have come to realize that there are different degrees of being a fan. 

Hence, I took it upon myself to define these fans, to broaden one's trash talking vocabulary. Not every fan that's not you is a "bandwagon" fan. This is from the perspective of the NBA Finals, but may somehow be related to other sports. I expect the upcoming World Cup to produce the same types of people arising.

*Author's Note: I may have missed out on a lot of things these people do. I'm apologizing right now for not being perfect. Also, all pictures are not mine.

Non-Fans

We love Morgan Freeman, but he speaks for the Non-Fans during these NBA Finals

These are basically people who do not care whatsoever on what is happening to the sport you so religiously follow. If they are aware, they probably don't have a clue as to what is actually happening but know that this could be a conversation starter. They have zero to minimum knowledge about the game, or have outdated knowledge about it.

Typical Reaction to "Did You See Ray Allen's Dunk in Game 1?": Who?

Where You See Them: Anywhere else not in front of a TV in the fourth quarter of a close game, minding their own business.

What They Do on Social Media: 1. "My feed is flooded again by these sports fans"
2. *Random work rant*
3. *Random quote*
4. *Selfie*/ *OOTD*

"What's Hot" Fans

Being where the action is is totally different from caring about the action. 

This is a level just above the Non-Fans. On an 82-game schedule, they hardly ever follow the NBA, but when everyone's talking about it (probably at the start of the Playoffs), they begin to load up on knowledge. They are the easiest people to invite to viewing parties because they're there for the party, not much for the viewing. They will surely root for someone, with the choice being the popular one. They have zero loyalty whatsoever. They aren't totally clueless about the game, but they probably won't offer much opinion about it.  

Typical Reaction to "Did You See Ray Allen's Dunk in Game 1?": Oo, pare lakas, lupeet! Sya yung shooter di ba?

Where You See Them: Viewing parties. They are also probably the first ones out an arena because they need to beat the traffic.

What They Do on Social Media: 1. "Woohoo! Great game!" *insert picture of choice beverage*
2. "Favorite/Like" anything positive about the team he/she is rooting for
3. Reposting memes because, it's what's in now. 

Bandwagon Fans

Focus on the seats, not the people. This is actually from Game 6 of last year's finals. IN MIAMI.

These are fans with knowledge of the game, but usually go with the flow of what's popular. They have a false sense of loyalty, which makes them one notch higher than the previous group. I say "false sense of loyalty" because they will rant and rave like they've been rooting for a team since its inception, but actually started following it when it was the "cool thing" to do. They know the game, and probably follow some popular personalities on social media to keep them up to date.

Typical Reaction to "Did You See Ray Allen's Dunk in Game 1?": Oo! Idol ko talaga yun!

Where You See Them: Carpooling with "What's Hot" Fans before games end. They could also be rooting for another team if it becomes more popular. (see fans of Lakers 03-04, Heat 10-11, Lakers 12-13)

What They Do on Social Media: 1. Joining (insert team name) Forever Fan groups
2. Re-posting pictures, memes, or status updates praising the team's win
3. Nothing if their team loses.

The Haters

No team has generated as much hate as the Heat have since coming together.

It shouldn't even be a word, but it's undeniable that they exist. They find fulfillment in pissing people off. They are fans who do enjoy the game, but their enjoyment in bashing people's teams have outweighed their love for the game. They especially hate the first two types of fans, and normally get into heated, almost irrational arguments with the next type of fans. 

Typical Reaction to "Did You See Ray Allen's Dunk in Game 1?": Weh, pinaulit-ulit mo lang siguro yun no?! La ka naman supot Heat mo!

Where You See Them: Scouring the web every positive comment or status about a popular team and making all-caps comments about how that team sucks. They are the hipsters of basketball fans.

What They Do on Social Media: 1. "OH ANO TAHIMIK NANAMAN KAYO?!?! HAHAHA" - when the "hated" team loses
2. Re-posting every possible meme about team being targeted.
3. Not reading links to articles but actively participating in comments section

The Fantards

Dude looks to fit the description of people who'd go into an irrational debate about LeBron being the GOAT

These are the irrationally passionate fans who root for a team, mostly because of a certain player. You probably could have an enjoyable discussion for the first five minutes if you're on the same page, but will probably get irritated once the 'tardness becomes apparent. They don't care what you think about other teams, just that their team is "the bestest" there ever was. If you have a short fuse, you will not like what they could do to you in the comments section of an article. 

Typical Reaction to "Did You See Ray Allen's Dunk in Game 1?": Wala yun sa dunk ni LeBron!

Where You See Them: Wearing the jersey of their favorite player while watching the game (or even on a casual day), possibly with facepaint. They also scour the internet for anything about their favorite player or team, and will attack whoever says anything bad about the said player or team.

What They Do on Social Media: 1. "____ IS THE BEST TEAM IN THE NBA HANDS DOWN!"
2. Bashing "haters"
3. "Defending" the team or player in "hater" articles/forums
4. "LUTO!!!!!!"
5. Reading the first two lines of an article then makes a comment like "LEBRON DABEST" o kaya "BOBO NG WRITER NYO SWEEP PA RIN YAN!"

Justifying Fans

Guy in checkered shirt; doesn't blatantly show affinity, but passionately interested

I like to think fall in this category. These are fans who always justify why they are cheering for a certain team. These are (who I'd like to believe to be) rational fans who have conditional loyalty to a team. Unlike fantards, they won't scour the internet to defend their team irrationally. They will recognize a loss if their team is outplayed, and maybe claim an injustice has been done to their team from time totime. They claim to be passionate about the game more than a particular team.

Typical Reaction to "Did You See Ray Allen's Dunk in Game 1?": Oo, totally unexpected! Pero ganda nung laban. Ganda.

Where You See Them: Stood up ready to leave Game 6 of the 2013 Finals, but tried to hang around because a miracle might happen. They may also be seen laughing their asses off reading fantards and "haters" go at it on social media. During discussions, expect that they will explain why they are cheering for a certain team, if only to disassociate themselves from the previous two types of fans, but not claim to be a "die-hard" fan.

What They Do on Social Media: 1. "Better luck next game!" - for every loss
2. Posts a lengthy analysis of what just happened
3. Reading links to legitimate websites offering analysis
4. Reading the comments section of said links
5. Making bold predictions

Die-Hard Fans

MSG = Spike Lee/Knicks, win or lose

This is as loyal as it gets. They love the sport, but they will only cheer for one team. Though they may display traits similar to those of the Fantards, Haters, and the Justifying Fans, they are on a class totally different. They may irrationally cheer for their team, but they are not afraid to criticize it when they lose. They will say hateful things about a rival team. They will explain that they've been cheering for a particular team since Day One. They also will almost not care about any other team. Hence, if their team gets booted out of the Playoffs, they're done watching. 

Typical Reaction to "Did You See Ray Allen's Dunk in Game 1?": Ng alin? Ah Finals na ba?

Where You See Them: If their team isn't in the current Finals, probably locked up in their room filled with their team memorabilia, hoping they get better in the offseason. If their team is actually in the Finals, they're probably camping out to buy tickets, or have scheduled leaves on each game day while wearing an old-school jersey bearing an old-school star some kids of today probably would not have heard of.

What They Do on Social Media: 1. *Spurs/Heat Die-Hard* - Posting instagram pictures of their George Gervin or Tim Hardaway jerseys
2. First one in, last one out, win or lose.
3. Rabidly hurling expletives against "haters" and anyone against his/her team
4. *Non-Finals team's Die-Hard fan* - minding their own business

Groupies

Probably waiting for Tony Parker. Or Chandler Parsons.

This is a hybrid of some of the earlier types of fans, mostly women. Some have no basketball knowledge, some have a lot, but all probably started following the game/team because of a particular good-looking player. It's not bad, really. They cheer wildly for the team, some even shamelessly asking what happened because they didn't understand what the call was. They will defend their team against "haters" but will stab your neck if you say anything bad against their pogi player. 

Typical Reaction to "Did You See Ray Allen's Dunk in Game 1?": Nag-dunk sya? Ewan ko, pero nakita mo ba kung gano kapogi si Tony sa floater nya?! Ayiiii....

Where You See Them: Cheering wildly for their favorite player's team. Win or lose, they will passionately proclaim their loyalty to said team. However, if player gets traded, they will most probably stick with him. Best illustrates "manalo, matalo, cute pa rin si ____"

What They Do on Social Media: 
1. Putting hearts on pictures of their favorite player
2. Reacting violently to every hard foul on favorite player
3. Throwing their own opinions on heated Fantards vs Haters discussions

The Betting Zone

Not a basketball fan, but this is the reaction of someone who bet on a team with a -4.5 after a buzzer beater that cut a seven point lead to four.

These people put money where their mouths are. They are usually the gambling versions of the last three types of fans. They can't take the bashing, and instead challenges Haters, Fantards, and other Die-Hard Fans to any bet that their team will win. Either you shut up, or take the bet, because they won't sit there taking all your insults quietly. 

Typical Reaction to "Did You See Ray Allen's Dunk in Game 1?": Di nga eh, 4th quarter na lang pinanood ko, baka hindi ma-cover ng Spurs yung linya eh.

Where You See Them: Having a heart attack at some corner despite his team leading by 15. After a 20 point win, s/he is smiling and will tell you that the line was +/-15.5.

What They Do on Social Media: 
1. Making bold predictions and asking who's willing to bet that s/he's not right
2. Deactivating his/her account after a game, only for you to find out later that they lost some big money.
3. Explaining their happiness or sadness through the parameters of their bet like everybody cares.

...Taking the Plunge...

"Lundagin mo, beybe"

- Fr. Roque Ferriols, SJ

There are pros and cons to both directions, but knowing them is useless unless you actually take one of them

I love youth. The innocence and ignorance of everything makes the world so simple, that nothing is impossible. Growing up, we realize not everything is as easy as we thought, and there are prerequisites for some of the things that we thought we could do freely. From all the wonderful things we thought of doing when we grow up (change the world, flying, inventing a food better than bacon, etc.), reality limits it to a finite number. As we age, this finite number becomes even smaller.

I don't think we're naturally limited. Not everyone is born seven feet tall or with a perfect face and physique to be an athlete or a celebrity or whatever. We are, however, responsible for taking a step towards opportunities that lead to those things we want to do.

Wanting to do something is totally different from planning to do something, and both are entirely useless if we don't actually do it. 

For the past several years, I've been wanting to do something that I really want to do. Circumstances had me choosing what I thought to be more practical over what I believe is my passion. There's always this route anyway.

However, for all the positive "go for it" attitude I have when friends and family ask for advise, I haven't "gone" for it. 

After years of teasing, of trying, of thinking, of planning, I have finally mustered the courage to actually go for it. 

I had a whole speech in my head on why I want to do this, and why I'm letting go of where I am professionally, but all I got was a shrug from my boss. Come to think of it, a long conversation about it might not be natural for him. 

Since Day 1, my boss treated me as we have agreed upon in September of 2010. I was an employee of the company, not a relative of the boss. I was scolded for making mistakes (publicly or privately), praised for accomplishments (usually not publicly, never had a problem with it), and assigned with duties within my job description. As a newbie in this industry, in the capacity that I was hired for, he taught me what to do as a person would teach another how to ride a bicycle. He gave me training wheels, took them out, guided me, and eventually let go.

I have come a long way from a clueless kid armed with nothing but empty words and the eternal "I'll get back to you on that" to an actual sales associate who can put knowledge and experience together to provide the customer with what they need. I know that for a fact. I still hate making phone calls, but when I do pick the phone up, I know what I'm saying. I'm more confident talking to customers when meeting with them. Clients can't bullshit their way to meetings, and I don't give as much bullshit when I don't know anything to make it seem like I know everything. I have learned the things that I should know, but I've also learned that I don't need to know everything to earn a customer's respect.

I probably won't have a boss as good as the one I have right now. When I asked him about leaving before, he told me his conditions but wasn't against my decision. I took it back, because I felt that I haven't performed well enough for him despite the trust he has given me. 

Approaching my 28th year of existence though, I felt the need to take the route I wanted to take, not a road I needed to tread. I could say that this is also driven by circumstances, but totally different from those which made me decide to stay. It pains me to leave this place behind, knowing how we're interdependent in our goal of making this company grow. However, taking away the emotional component of this decision, I know for certain that the company is bigger than a single part of it. 

Thinking about what lies ahead, moving on now is the right thing for me to do if I want to pursue my passion. I can't let opportunities slide by because I'm being too cautious of choosing "the right thing" according to the standards of the people that matter to me. 

I have chosen "me" before, but it was too soon, pressured by time, and decided by things that are beyond my control. This time around, I am choosing "me" because of a grand plan bigger than this one decision. I am plunging into an unknown, but in a time I determined myself. This is, after all, a learned decision made through deep reflection; I'm fully aware of what to expect and what I'm leaving behind. This isn't forced by a deadline set by others or a blind ambition. This is one step towards a goal, which leads to multiple other life goals. 

All that's left for me to do now, is jump.

The end of June 2014 will be the edge I jump off from.

...Finishing Second: A Fan's Look at Rain Or Shine's All-Filipino Cup Run...

The PBA's first conference ended with the San Mig Coffee Mixers raising their second consecutive trophy (at least chronologically) after defeating the Rain Or Shine Elastopainters last Wednesday. 

Truth be told, I am disappointed. I was confident we'd go through Petron in the semis, and even brashly proclaimed that whoever wins in the SMC-BGK series was only playing for second place. And now, here we are, second place. The better team won.

I admit defeat, but I don't regret even the slightest bit that I made such a bold proclamation. I believe in the teams I cheer for, and have lost a bit of cash putting my money where my mouth was when someone called me out. I stopped doing it slightly because I think I've lost too much, but mostly because no one really steps up for their teams anymore. People can be all talk but can't even bet a slap on the face (I've literally bet on face slaps).

Now, I have no excuses, just a commentary on why we lost, why I thought we could beat such a powerhouse, and a tribute to the other team I cheered for before pledging allegiance to Rain Or Shine. 

*all images from Google, sites credited for those without watermark.

Rain or Shine Key Points

The Rotation

Different heroes every game. Doesn't need a huge crowd to get them back in a game down big.
*Image from Rain Or Shine Elasto Painters Family Facebook page 

One of the biggest strengths of the Elastopainters is their rotation. Unlike superstar teams of the NBA where there are 3-4 guys and  bunch of other guys, RoS trots a lineup pretty much like the Detroit Pistons of 2004. There aren't legit superstars who need to be on the floor for 40 minutes. What they have are a collection of basketball players who know their roles and are all in on what the Coach says. They don't have egoistic players who demand for trades because they don't get on the floor or they don't touch the ball too often. This is the reason why I love this team. 

However, this strength can only get a team so far. The superstars get their numbers precisely because they have the minutes on the floor to work on it. By spreading minutes, Rain or Shine overcomes fatigue, but they can't get a particular player going. True, the 12-man rotation can mess up an opponent's read on both offense and defense, but on the flipside, our players are getting messed up as well. It almost becomes a prerequisite then that once called to action, a RoS player must be hot and effective on D right away. You can do that in the regular season, but the playoffs is a whole different story. 

RoS won on a short rotation in Game 5, but it didn't produce the same result in Game 6. I think one of the reasons is putting the wrong people in too long. Ian Sanggalang scored like Jeff Chan was a lamp post before they decided to switch Paul Lee on him. Lee, for his part, let his men cut inside (as he's done throughout the series) while he's trying to help double on the post up. Larry Rodriguez, for all his gulang, wasn't effectively contributing on the boards as he usually did but was put in for a longer stretch than Jervy Cruz. I guess a better understanding of the players' strengths and weaknesses could help the coaching staff determine the most effective use of that shortened rotation. 

Up to Game 4 of the series, they magnified those strengths to their advantage. Against a bench tactician like Tim Cone, those "strengths" became one-dimensional skills. Think of it this way; Jeff Chan is a good shooter, but actually improved his slashing and even last year, knew when to pass the ball. With a long rotation, Chan came off the bench to provide bench scoring power. He was basically put in to shoot the ball because there were others who could concentrate on doing everything else. TY Tang was there for passing, Alex Nuyles could be the slasher, Jeric Teng could be an outside gunner, etc.. The regular season showed that this was effective because he shot about 40% from the field. In the Finals, his shooting clip suffered a lot because SMC made him work on defense, at the post no less. 

Put simply, they relied on their depth so that they could focus on what they were good at, but couldn't adjust when they were shut down. Faced with desperation, they forced their ways to get themselves going, and the Mixers pounced on them. Their system worked wonderfully in keeping them fresh while winning in the regular season, but it took a dynamic system from a brilliant coach to beat them. 

Outside Shooting

Chan just couldn't get his game going.

The Elastopainters have great shooters. In fact, outside shooting is such a good trait of the team that they have Raymond Almazan actually believing that he can hit it on a regular basis. 

It has blown out opponents and saved the Painters countless times. However, against the Mixers, they just wouldn't go in. Paul Lee's two attempts in one possession with about a minute to go in the 4th quarter of Game 6 probably best exemplified how their shooting throughout the series has been. He had an open look, and then again a Paul Lee-signature stepback three but it just didn't fall. SMC's defense was great, but I can't fully credit it for RoS missing those long bombs; we got the looks we wanted, they just didn't go in. 

Speaking of the SMC defense, it forced RoS to shoot from the outside quite a few times, but it wasn't the sole reason for RoS opting for threes. We had a lot of looks early in the shot clock that were made so that there would be an open shooter. Again, the shots just did not fall for us.

Defense

No jumps, just keeping their feet on the ground.
*image from gmanetwork.com

Rain or Shine is known best for its defense and I almost find it funny that this is despite not having a lot of players who are able to jump up to block shots. The "Never Say Diet" team gets stops despite not blocking ala-DeAndre Jordan. Guarding passing lanes and trapping are two of the best ways for RoS to get their transition game going. One on one, we have Gabe Norwood, Jireh Ibanez, and Ryan Arana as our best defenders. 

This was exploited by SMC the most. With such a stacked team, there were going to have mismatches just about everywhere. They had Norwood or Ibanez play either Simon, Yap, or Barroca, but that left everyone else to do their thing. I mentioned Sanggalang earlier. Yap, Simon, and Devance all had their turn cutting to the basket if they had Paul Lee guarding them from the outside. At the post though, Sanggalang and Devance had to work for their points against Lee. Chan, for his part, got beaten up so bad at the post that he barely had enough air to run around to get space on offense. 

Team defense works so well for RoS, but the excellent floor spacing by the Mixers prevented RoS from helping. The team needs to learn how to adjust on the fly if they are forced to play one on one defense, and they need to be more comfortable with the tendencies of their teammates and opponents so that they can fill their weaknesses on defense. 

The Walkout

That awkward moment, when you make a dramatic walkout, and the stupid door is still locked.

The crowd at the Big Dome roared in disbelief, while the supporters were in a state of shock. It was unorthodox, and I probably wouldn't do it myself. However, stand by Coach Yeng's decision to do it. Despite in-game and post-game comments, the refs are still drawn to who the crowd favors. Ginebra gets a break from these whistles 8/10 times. SMC played through it and beat them handily in Game 7. RoS couldn't do it, and felt their pleas fell to deaf ears.

If I were on the other side of the fence, I'd say all the same shit the SMC fans are throwing at RoS for the walkout. It's totally understandable. But being on this side, I'd throw my own thousand pesos if RoS needed a fund for the fine. I don't know how else I'd make a statement stronger than that.

It had somewhat of an effect; the refs weren't calling the "pwet-box out" as I call it about three plays after that. Then they went back to calling it. Not saying they shouldn't altogether, all I'm saying is, call it if it's not allowed. Don't let it go and then at the crucial moments blow the whistle every single time. RoS will play the Gulang card on defense, and it's up to the refs what type of contact they will allow. Playoff basketball demands more physical play. The refs don't need to call college fouls in a playoff series. 

Fighting to the End

It's the passion for the game that made me love this team. Sometimes though, emotions get the better of Coach.
*Image from inquirer.net

Ryan Arana said in an interview after the Game 5 win that Coach Yeng threatened them that if he saw anyone seemingly give up, "tatapusin ko ang career nyo dito". Everyone played with more desperation than ever in that game. 

Bets aside, I don't lose faith in my team unless we're down 10 with under 24 seconds left in the game. I don't switch channels to wait if my team can come back, I watch every second of the 4th to see how they will. It's one of the things I love about the team. 

In Game 4 though, there were so many moments when I saw the team give up. I wanted to believe we could cut it down to 7, and at one point, we did. However, with every made basket by the Mixers, they sulked. With every missed shot, they bowed their heads instead of trying to get the loose ball. They gave up like they didn't before. 

In Game 6, Jireh played like he'll die for the ball as he always did. Ryan played like he didn't have a shoulder injury (until falling on the floor made him remember he did). Gabe only stopped defending when the ball went through the hoop already. But then there are moments when you see Larry Rodriguez bowing his head after missing a shot instead of looking at where the ball is (which was tapped to someone right behind Rodriguez). Then Coach Yeng just totally lost it when he was in the ref's passing lane for the inbound. That was a dagger more painful than Barroca's three over Gabe. 

We lose because we gave up. Refs calls be damned, we shouldn't have let them take us out of the game. SMC did it by beating the living hell out of the Gin Kings in Game 7 because that's how you beat teams favored by refs; you hit your shots. 

A Shoutout to the Mixers

The Scoring Apostle

The only way to defend Simon is pray that he won't make the shot.

Truthfully, even in my previous blog, Simon is that one guy from SMC that I fear the most on offense. He doesn't need a million moves to beat you; he'll just need you to give him enough breathing room and he'll hit the shot. It wouldn't matter if he's open or not, he will hit a shot.

He's had cold nights but if he gets his shot going, there's no telling when he'll stop. Peter June Simon was one of the players I loved watching in the PBA and was one of the reasons why I stayed loyal to Alvin Patrimonio's squad until I got pissed with Ryan Gregorio and the team letting go of talents such as Paul Artadi (to BGK at the time) and Ping (to Magnolia, I think, at the time). Now it's difficult to root against him because of all the things he brings to the table. 

The Heart of Offense and Defense

Them boys know how to work their team up.
*Image from ph.sports.yahoo.com

Speaking of people difficult to root against, how about the heart of SMC's offense and defense; Mark Andy Barroca and Jean-Marc Pingris, respectively. Barroca comes off the bench and finishes the game much like Manu Ginobili of the Spurs. He's an unfair bench guy who should automatically take home the 6th Man of the Year award every single year he doesn't win an MVP title. I think he's already the best two-way guard in the PBA today, right up there with Jason Castro. 

On defense, is there any doubt that Pingris is the heart that keeps pumping life to that SMC defense? He's an undersized PF in international competitions, but in the Philippines, he is arguably the best player at the post. He's no longer the offensive liability that he was early in his career with his newfound weapon which I'd almost accuse SMC to be teaching all their players; that one-hander in the lane seems to be a staple for every one on their team. 

Players can't catch up to Barroca and they can't shake Pingris off. Either one of them deserved the MVP trophy for putting the team on their shoulders.

James Yap

Jireh messed up James the first time they met in the Finals. James was having none of it this series.

I've been critical of James Yap because he failed to deliver every single time I counted on him. I rooted for his UE Red Warriors before I went to UST. I was excited that he had Paul Artadi as his running mate again in Purefoods. I rooted for him to win that championship they didn't get while playing for UE and it took me years before they actually won one, and I don't even think Artadi was there. 

This season, like the past couple of seasons, James wasn't hitting his shots. He was all hype with no game left to speak of. I actually wanted James to shut me up in I think Game 3 or 4 of the BGK series. He failed to deliver again. 

Then there was Game 5 of that series when he finally delivered. You could call it a fluke, but he hit some pretty big shots in Game 6 before the refs bailed Ginebra out with a petty foul on Yap to Caguioa. In Game 7, he just went wild. 

I thought he'd be shooting blanks already by the Finals, but he had that push in him to hit big shots to either stretch leads or bring them back. This was a James Yap series that I wished to have seen when I was cheering for them. 

The Other Guys

Alex "The Project" Mallari is a Tim Cone favorite as a big ball handler

Rain or Shine is considered deep, but that's because Coach Yeng utilizes everyone on the bench with some of his hugot tactics. Teams under SMC are known to be really stacked with big names. Anything short of championships are disappointments for Ginebra, Petron, and San Mig Coffee. It was on full display in this Finals series, and even in the season.

Ginebra had a pseudo-coach always making his opinions on timeouts despite a head coach already holding the board. Petron has a collection of stars who can't buy in to what the coach is preaching because they haven't had a coach that lasted a full three conferences over the past couple of years. When then-BMeg got Coach Tim Cone, he was given a full reign on the team, and he was able to build the team he wanted (Alex Mallari yow!) and incorporate a system in such a way that it isn't player-dependent. 

Having said that, SMC still had the capacity to sign big name players into this iron clad system of Coach Tim. The butt of my jokes has been Alex Mallari, a former third overall pick in the draft. He played a couple of good games. They have guys like Ian Sanggalang who's underrated only because no one watches the NCAA and Greg Slaughter commanded such great attention. If it wasn't Raymond, I would've loved to have Ian in RoS just so he could play with Pampanga's own Coach Yeng. Joe Devance, who I usually call "Boy Fancy Pass" is a mismatch nightmare. The bigs can't keep up with him, and the guards can't cover his size. When he's not trying too much, he knows how to make the right plays and can shoot from just about anywhere on the court. Justin Melton was a revelation late in the season. He's an athletic guy who can carry the ball and shoot from a distance, but has the tendency to dribble too much. He reminds me of Shannon Brown of the Lakers. Rafi Reavis can get way up for boards. Yancy De Ocampo is a crafty post player. 

See, no matter how deep their lineup is, Coach Tim has about 8 guys he'd play this deep in the postseason, but every once in a while he could turn someone like Jerwin Gaco into more than just a punchline. With an expansion team coming in, wouldn't it be nice to know that there's a team like SMC who will not be able to protect some of these other guys and may have a chance to shine  elsewhere? 

Tim Cone

Just passed Coach Baby Dalupan's record. Nice to see what looks like an unbeatable record broken in my lifetime.
*Image from untvweb.com

What else can be said about the winningest coach of all time? When faced with the choice between Ginebra or Alaska back in the 90's, I've always went with Tim Cone's Milkmen. In the time when the league was ultra-competitive with teams not hoarding talent for themselves, Alaska was one of the teams I admired because of how well they moved together as a team. Ginebra was a popular choice, what with players and their "Never Say Die" attitude back then, but it was more of will. The Milkmen played in some kind of order I never would have understood as a kid just learning the game. 

It was effective 20 years ago (gahd, I'm old), and it remains effective now. It's not because it is unbeatable, it's because Coach Tim has made a dynamic system that he could call his own. Over the years of learning the game while coaching on the sidelines, he's made subtle changes to make sure that the system isn't completely broken. 

============================================================================

The next conference starts on Wednesday, March 5, and I'm excited about it again. Some trades in the offseason and our beloved Coach Pido will finally call the shots for his own team in the PBA. It's a great time to be a fan of the PBA right now.

...Of Entitlement and Comfort: A Third World Mentality...

I love living in the Philippines. I really do. It is one of the main reasons why I didn't pursue a course related to computers despite having an introduction to it during my High School days in Don Bosco. I thought that it would lead to opportunities abroad, but not too much here, so I decided to find another calling. But that's another story.

I enjoyed travelling to Singapore. They have an awesome public transport system that makes you feel like you don't need a car to go around because it is safe enough. My girlfriend said she enjoyed Korea immensely and that it was nice there as well. I haven't been to Japan, but from what I've gathered, it's a nice place to visit as well (despite the steep price to pay).

Not too long ago, we were the toast of the town in Asia. We were the country our neighbors looked up to. When we won "Democracy" from Martial Law, everything went downhill. I am not saying I'd rather have Martial Law and "Ferdinand Marcos is the best president of all time.. All time!" because I don't believe the latter and I highly doubt that the former will give me the opportunity to write this.

"Democracy" has given us an almost irrational feeling of entitlement to everything and anything, and inspired a kind of "me" mentality rather than a genuine love for the country and fellow men. Being a Catholic-dominated country also probably contributes to this. As a result, we remain a third world country and will continue to be one unless genuine change (not this "change" the current administration wants us to believe) happens over the next two administrations. I explain my points below:

A Genuine Concern for Others

Everyone needs it, just line up to get it yours
*Photo from inquirer.net

When a huge tsunami devastated Japan some years back, the world was amazed at how orderly everyone was despite the tragedy. Japanese people lined up for relief goods, got what was allocated for them and left. Those who weren't able to get any left and hoped to get supplies next time. They understand the concept that they are all suffering from the same fate, and accepted that while they did not get theirs, some other family did.

The Philippines has had a number of tragedies that challenged our spirit, none more recent probably than Yolanda. I am not and have not been in their situation, but I am from the formerly Ondoy-devastated Cainta. I can't speak from experience, but only through those that I've read. And comparing those which I've read, I say we lack this genuine concern for our fellow men. We've read of looting, killings, and even rape happening in the typhoon-torn areas. It seemed worse than a zombie apocalypse.

We received millions in foreign help, and countless more from countrymen in the metro, but it didn't seem like the help was enough. There were alleged conflict on who was supposed to distribute the goods, who takes credit,, etc. In the midst of such tragedy, some people still had the gall to worry of their own personal gains rather than just help.

I don't think it is limited to that tragedy. We see it everyday on the streets; people shoving each other to get in a public transport system, cars cutting through multiple lanes or even counterflowing just so they could get to the endpoint faster, public utility vehicles stopping wherever they like to wait on passengers, people cutting in line in a convenience store, and many more. There are rules on the road, and unwritten rules of courtesy that we follow to have a sense of order. People disregard these to prioritize themselves. And when chaos ensues, they blame the government for not doing anything about it.

An Irrational Feeling of Entitlement

Why must you risk your life for a shortcut?
*Photo from pinoytransplant.com

Taking a cue from being genuinely concerned for others, these same people who lack this concern put themselves higher than others and the law. Pedestrians walk under footbridges and shout expletives at you if you don't let them pass. Commuters decide to just ask the driver to stop when they are right in front of where they want to go down, not even giving the slightest respect for the "No Loading and Unloading" sign situated perfectly where the person wants to go down. Jeepney drivers swerve left and right at their own time, often sticking out a hand as if it means he has the priority to take the lane you're in only to stop in front of you while passengers are boarding.

I don't get where they get this sense of entitlement from. We are all children of God, but why the hell do these people act as if they were an only child? Why does order, rules, and courtesy mean so little to people as if they're the only ones who are in a hurry?

Footbridges are a pain, and they aren't exactly placed where we want to be. But they were made such that pedestrians won't bother traffic. The jeep is a public utility vehicle, not a fucking cab. If you want to go down right at your doorstep, take a damn cab. While in a PUV, go down or board proper loading and unloading zones. People find themselves to be too important that they shouldn't be inconvenienced by these "rules". PUV's, for their part, can give way to traffic if they know that they'll just block the way while they wait for passengers to board. I think the democracy that our people won in 1986 only gave us the confidence that we are "free" to do just about anything we want.

A Separation Not Quite

The House of God and some streamers.
*Photo from gmanetwork.com

       

The Philippine Constitution has a clause that separates the Church and the State. However, when you hear mass in most Churches, there are some priests who urge their parishoners on the Church's stand on current political issues. I'm not saying they don't have the right, because it is probably the only venue that they have to reach out to their followers.

I think the country's development is somehow hampered by how we want to be perceived. We are a Catholic country, and it is one of the things we want to keep others to see us as. Hence, we voted for people who approved laws to provide housing for squatters whose houses (which they never legally owned) were demolished. We have lengthy debates on our personal stands regrading the reproductive health bill, divorce, and same sex marriage. Most don't want to be frowned upon by choosing the less "Catholic" choice.

We may not always agree with the choices of the Church, and the Church may not be directly to blame. However, to please the populace, public officials take it upon themselves to appear as "good guys" by siding with whatever stand the Church goes by. I daresay that by trying to put religion on a pedestal, we fail to see what needs to be done to improve the country.

The "Balato" System

What does vice owe you, kuya?
*Photo from pnsers.com

Whenever someone wins something, or something good happens to someone, people feel a sense of entitlement to seek "balato" from that person. This, I think stems again from our "strong" religious background as a Catholic country. It is taught that we must "share our blessings".

I don't discourage people from sharing their blessings. It is really up to you, on where you find your peace. But don't feel obligated to share something you've earned or won to people who are just waiting for those that you will share. I bet a lot on random stuff. At the moment I'm making a particular bet, I am ridiculed for being such a gambler. As soon as I win, these same hypocrites ask "balato" from my winnings.

There are people who invest in something, or worked their ass off for something, and when they look like they're making it, they get the "manlibre ka naman" or "big time ka na!" treatment as if these hecklers are responsible for their success. Isn't Christmas time the part of the year when all the bums are out in public?

This "balato" system is not new. I am certain that each one of us has a couple of people like these in our lives. They don't do shit, but expect to have a share of the good fortune one earned or won. It is a practice that drags our society down.