...On Tragedy...

Never in my wildest dreams that these stuff would actually happen within my proximity. Floods that devour houses are, in my mind, reserved for news reports. 

In my 19 years of living here in our current home, we were never bothered by floods, no matter how hard the rain fell, no matter how flooded the other phases were, our home stayed safe. Last Saturday, as my mom was to go to the market, they literally tried every car we had to try to get her there, but the flood was too much even for out 6-wheeler truck. By afternoon, our street had ankle-deep water on the street, which meant that this rain was by far the strongest that we've experienced. My dad and my uncle went to help out at my aunt's house some streets away, as the flood was coming into their house. Some time later, my mom got a message from my aunt saying their fridge fell on my dad's foot.  I rushed without thinking, as I wanted to do what I can to help him. For the first time in my life, I experienced flood that was actually up to my chest, even up to my lips, and even strong currents brought about by the flood. I thought it was a stupid idea, rushing to my aunt's house knowing I'm the only one walking down the street and with just a slip,  I could die, and no one would even know. 

Thankfully, I got through, and learned my dad was ok. I got to help an old lady from across the street who had their house almost completely submerged to move to their neighbor's 2nd floor. But that was all the tragedy I experienced. I can't say the same for all the rest.

All the time that I was at home, bored out of my wits, all I could think of was how my friends were. I can't do a freakin thing, because the rest of our village is pretty messed up as well, and I can't even ask how my friends are doing, and what I could do to help. 

After the storm, my 2 uncles and my aunt's houses were a mess, my 2 uncles both had flood ruin their cars. As for us, we were lucky enough not to have lost anything, nor did we suffer the same fate as millions have. I can't thank the Lord enough. Today, instead of going to work, I helped my uncle out, and asked to help Issa out as well. More than my willingness to help them, I actually wanted to do it to give back to God even just a bit, after keeping us safe throughout this whole ordeal. 

It's refreshing to see strangers helping strangers out. Media pathetically hypes up some prominent people who help out, but really, what's important is that people help people out. Because it didn't just happen over the television. Because we can actually do something to help. 

I would've wanted to write a longer piece on this, considering the time I spent away from the computer. But really, I can't say much about what happened. The wreckage I see outside everyone's houses say enough. Less talk, more do. 

Let's move and try to do whatever we can to help the others. 

...On Getting Used to Being Single...

For the first time for as long as I can remember, I'm actually single-single. No commitments whatsoever to anyone in particular, no longer waiting for someone, not even trying to impress anyone. I feel free. I can be where I want to be or dragged where I want to be. I can go with who I choose to be with. I can do anything I want and I don't have to answer to anyone else except my parents, who, to some extent, actually get me, and understand my occassional bursts of arrogance and just allow me to do pretty much whatever I want. I can get wasted so badly and I don't have to come up with logical/acceptable reasons for getting too f'd up because I wake up with no new messages asking where the hell I was because she's getting worried. I can go home anytime I want to and not get bothered that I still have to take someone home.

I should be happy, I guess, with all this freedom. Yet, somehow, I'm not. It's not me. I'm way too mushy for this.

Back then, it was kind of ok to mingle just a bit, because no one else mattered as much as who I was with. I may have missed out on a lot of things, but during those times, I had one thing that's sure in my life: her. When I wanted to have dinner with someone, she was there. When I felt crappy, I could always spend time with her and the day's not as bad. When there was a good movie up, I had a date. When I wanted to just get out of the house, I had someone to be with. When Valentine's is coming, I had reason to prepare. Before I sleep, there was always that "i love you:)" at the end of every message, and a "good morning" when I wake up that actually makes me feel that it is a good morning.

Now, I'm like everybody's man, but nobody's someone. I may be everywhere with anybody, but then, I don't brighten anyone's day by being there for her, I don't make anything better for anyone by being there for him/her in shitty times, I'm not the essential piece to a "good time", heck, I can't even have a regular movie date.

I kinda miss being the first option for a movie date, that is, the first person that comes to mind right after the thought of “I wanna watch that movie”. I miss making someone actually feel ok after a crappy day because I'm with her already. I miss being thought about as much as I think about someone. I miss holding someone's hand and not saying anything while walking along anywhere, but still have a feeling of comfort and ease with that hand. I miss wiping a smudge of sauce on a girl's face while we're eating. I miss looking at someone sitting on my passenger seat while I'm driving. I miss surprising someone with a visit or a gift. I miss doing something random for someone, like actually buying something that she jokingly says she likes. I miss saying "I love you" and being said "I love you too" and have that to really mean something.

It's always great to meet someone who gets to be your everything: your bestfriend, your sweetheart, your parent, your brother/sister.. But then if things don't work out you're pretty much screwed.

Thinking about it too much won't do me any good though. Eh sa wala eh.  F*ck mushiness. In God's time, "she" will come. For now, I guess I'll just have to deal with this "single" gig, enjoy this freedom.

After all, I am still learning..

...I choose Noynoy..

On the Criteria of Choosing

Last Saturday, I had a chance to listen in to a brilliant talk by Atty. Alex Lacson, who talked about his criteria for choosing who to vote for, among other things. Let me share his 5 points and explain it through how I remembered them. 

1. On the Use of Power

Being in a position in the government, one can do a lot of things. As the overused quote Uncle Ben said to Peter in Spiderman goes, "with great power, comes great responsibility". The ZTE scam is but one of the many examples of how the government works. Businessmen know all too well that Customs always have a cut on imported products before they're cleared.

Now, there are a bunch of people gunning for the top position in the country, a position that pays 60,000PhP a month. In order to do that, they spend millions on TV ads to introduce themselves to the whole country. No, Korina, I am not talking about Mar alone. I may not be a Conrado de Quiroz, but I sure don't want you to go crying around like Mar's a victim or something because people are "singling him out". My point is, it's difficult to understand how these politicians can spend so much money to gain a position where they'd earn less than what they're going to earn. Then I realize that MIkey Arroyo's net worth jumped from PhP 5mil to PhP 76.9mil from 2002 to 2005, and it all kinda makes sense. 

I was a student politician at some point in my life, and yes, I do wonder sometimes how the hell we can spend about 20k for about 4 days of campaigning for a position that will not pay us anything. But personally, my intention was clear from day one they asked me why I'm doing it: for personal gain, because it'd look good on my resume to have been a student leader, and in turn, it would be for the benefit of all, because I can't brag about being the president or something of some useless student council or organization. We raised the funds from working alumni, and some saved up allowance from us students. We spent for something that would not come back to us in monetary value because we, both students and alumni, thought it was the least we could do to contribute to the betterment of the family that was the Faculty of Arts and Letters, to which we owe our college education to. But we were students. We would have our allowance if we worked or not. Being a politician may be of public service, but it's still an occupation. Ask your parents to buy you a PS3, and see if you wouldn't go into an argument with them, starting with "bakit mo naman kailangan nun?".

In the real world, that which is outside of the walls of a school, much more in a third-world country, money is hard to get. And you always want value for your money, unless you're freakishly rich. When you buy something, you always think of what good it'll do to you. So now, being a politician who spends millions, what good would it to for them in return?

Among all the candidates, it seems only Noynoy is the only one who will not abuse his power. He carries with him the good name of his father, and the legacy of his mother. He has no intention of running except for the clamor of people urging him to.  

2. On Appropriation of Funds

In my dad's native home in Bicol, the constructed roads were wide enough for an Isuzu Trooper. Two tricycles can't even pass through opposite directions at the same time. 

Here's what happens to funds, according to him: A congressman has pork barrel. He allocates a portion of it to construct roads to the place he reperesents. But, before doing so, congressman already has a 30% cut. Then the funds are recieved by the mayor, who in turn takes his own cut before paying a foreman or something to do the roads. The foreman then takes his cut before constructing the road. As a result, the supposedly 6-meter wide road becomes a 2-meter road. 

Now, I could not answer how Noynoy appropriated or misappropriated funds during his tenure as a congressman, but one thing I can be sure of, he did not take anything from public funds. To this day, after 9 years of serving as a congressman and two years as a senator, he still has no house to call his own, a Ford Everest care of his sister, and only his watch to call his luxury. 

3. On Lifestyle

Erap was a gambler. He had a lot friends who gambled as well. He took care of them, and he took care of his vice. Ultimately, it led to his downfall, and with him, he somewhat dragged the country, because we revolted for morality at that time for EDSA 2.

I could not speak for other candidates, but as far as Noynoy is concerned (God, I can hear Mikey's voice saying "well as far as I'm concerned and as far as my lawyers are concerned..."

 forgive me for using the phrase, but I had to, as it was appropriate), through my dad and I think Mr. Lacson's account as well, Noynoy doesn't have any vices; he doesn't smoke, drink, or gamble. He does not need to sustain any vice. 

Noynoy leads a humble lifestyle as well. As I mentioned earlier, his only luxury is his watch. I don't see him being escorted by black Expeds with blinkers and whatnot, nor do I see him employing a driver. I'd like to hear you say that for other candidates in the running. 

4. On the Heart of a Servant

Leadership by example. Educated in the halls of Don Bosco Mandaluyong, I have a good idea of what servant-leadership is. Some of the candidates may exude this trait, but I'll talk about Noynoy. 

By my dad's account, when Ninoy was imprisoned, he passed the responsibility of taking care of the family to Noynoy, his only son. From then and to this day, Noynoy has fulfilled that promise, and acts as the father figure in the Aquino family. It is mainly one of the reasons why he has not found a wife for himself yet. He has put his family ahead of his personal interest. 

5. On Competence

Noynoy is an educated man, having studied out west (forgot where). From there, I can already claim that he's more educated than at least one president that we had. 

With regards to competence for the position, here's where people tend to take a hit on Noynoy. We have not heard bad things that he did, but we're not exactly sure if there were good things that he did in his 9 years as congressman and 2 years as a senator. Manny Villar probably stands out in his own right here, as does Binay and Bayani Fernando, among others. But I don't think competence on his position is all that matters. I echo my dad in saying that knowing how to delegate work to the correct people matters as much. Running a country is not about one person alone. 

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Again, I'm not saying Noynoy has a monopoly for each. Some may epitomize one or the other, but generally, Noynoy exudes all. Try justifying another candidate who may have all. 

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On Sympathy, Moral Ascendency: The Philippines as a Third World Country

I choose Noynoy not because of sympathy over the loss of Tita Cory. Tita Cory's death only showed me that when bound by a common goal, we Filipinos can achieve great things. 

Let me remind you people that we live in a third-world country. Yes, we always aspire to be a decent-living country, a first-world one at that, but the fact of the matter is, we live in a third world country. We are a first-world country-wannabe. Now, after we accept that fact, maybe we can see things a bit more clearly. 

Having said that, I raise my first point: The upcoming elections is going to be automated, something that first world countries have been doing. Now, despite the ease of counting and the modern feel to it, automated counting only opens new means to manipulate votes.

In 1992, FVR won as the minority president, with the votes being split so closely, it could've gone to anyone. In 1998, the ruling administration's manipulation of votes in favor of their bet, JDV, couldn't topple the sheer number of votes that went to eventual winner, Erap. In 2003, GMA won a relatively close race against FPJ, but we later were greeted by Garci tapes, and now, GMA is serving her "I am sorry" term. 

What's so different between those elections? Well, in 1992 (based on what I read), FVR wanted to continue the legacy of EDSA, something he felt would not go on with Danding Conjuanco, his party's choice to be the standard bearer. Thus the honest election that was showed the diversity of people's competent choices, and in the end, it was Ramos who won. In 1998, the ruling party's bet was JDV, and despite their attempted manipulation of votes in favor of JDV(I do believe that this is where the term dagdag-bawas was coined) plus the fact that there was also a diverse number of candidates, Erap just had such an overwhelming number of votes and won the presidency. In 2003, we had a chance to vote for someone not named Gloria. But, because of the diversity of interest, we couldn't choose among the running leaders: Roco was probably a good choice, but apparently, there weren't enough people who believed in his platform of "Hope". Lacson was too much of a disciplinarian that people feared he may be the next Marcos. FPJ had the hearts of the masses, and those competent enough settled for GMA, who had the best chance to win against FPJ, so that we won't have another Erap. That made it easier for GMA to manipulate votes, and those who still believe that GMA won that race can just listen to her "Sorry" speech, after I slap your face and tell you how naive you are. 

And now, we're being bombarded by how great automated elections is going to be. No matter how much they sell it as a "fool-proof", "more effective" means of election, it's still man-made, something some smart guy programmed and something that some smart ass can't crack at the right price. If they can manipulate manual votes, how the hell can they not manipulate automated votes?

My second point is about corruption. We are a third world country because "government" has become synonymous with corruption. It has been so widespread that we take it as a norm. When before, seeing a policeman while driving means you're saved from being lost, now, seeing one makes you want to check if you have your seatbelt on, or if you're driving on the right side of the road. Politicians, on their part, are always seen as rich bastards, when in fact, businessmen earn more than they do every month. How they sustain whatever they have is no mystery.

In these times, what we need is not change, we are not America, people. We need good governance. Among those who declared their intentions, I know I'd like to choose Manny Villar, as he is a success story in his own right. But to some extent, he may have used his position to gain ground on some things. And yes, I'd say he may have done good things for our country, but what I don't like with Manny winning is that people would vote for him because they think he'd be the best candidate out there (is Noli de Castro really being considered by you?) in terms of "competency" with the position. That's what we did with GMA. A vote for Villar would be a vote to pass the ball of responsibility solely on him. Then people would just lay back and criticize what he's going to do. Shame me, and tell me what you did AFTER you voted for GMA over FPJ. Was it enough to prevent her from acquiring millions? 

I choose Noynoy because people don't see him being ready for the position. Yes, running a country is not something you "test waters" on. But my point is, a vote for Noynoy is a vote of trust, and a vote of action at the same time. Trust, because I believe in his leadership by example, that our other leaders may follow his goal of good governance. Of action, because knowing that he is not ready for the position, I want an active participation in what can be done to make his administration work. I am driven to learn what my rights are as a citizen, and practice it, because people under the president may still abuse their position, knowing that the president is "not capable enough". Active participation, dahil kailangan kong may itaya para samahan ang pagtaya ni Noynoy para sa bayan.

I think Noynoy's time is now. You could say that the sympathy angle is playing here, but must our country be sold in whole and our taxes pocketed by the abusive before we realize that what our country needs is good governance?

I invite a good debate on your take.