...Recipies...

My Numb-Emo-Naturally Happy state, and the fact that I'm bored out of my brains here in the office, makes my mind wander elsewhere and come up with crazy recipies of mine. Meant to entertain. Enjoy!

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1. Getting What You Want

Ingredients:

6 numbers
1 lotto ticket
100% luck

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Procedure:

1. Buy ticket.
2. Input numbers.
3. Hope for the best.

(Note: Doesn't always work. Things mess up at #3. Notify me when you got it right.=P)

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2. Sweet Tooth

Ingredients:

3 Long bars, 3 Musketeers chocolate bar.
500ml water
1 good book or 1 good show

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Procedure:

1. Open bar of chocolate.
2. Enjoy and induldge in the chocolate over choclate goodness.
3. Occassional water breaks in between bars, or 1 full gulp in the end. You wouldn't want the chocolate washed down immediately.

(note: Cartoons and comics are best suggested for the ultimate "kid" feeling)

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3. Beef Lover

Ingredients:

1 Big Burger
(Suggestions: Wendy's Hamburgers' Baconator, Jollibee Champ, Burger Avenue's Ridiculous Burger, Burger King's Angus Beef Burger, Brother's Burgers' big burger which I forgot the name of, McDonald's Double Quarter Pounder, Tropical Hut's Ranchero Burger, Banchetto's monstrous-looking burgers. There are a couple more I tasted, I think, but for now, those are the burgers I remember.)

1 Large Coke
1 Companion

*Optional:
Mustard

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Procedure:

1. Choose burger joint.
2. Buy the biggest burger there is.
*If option was chosen, draw a happy face on your pattie using the mustard.=) Big eyes and smile encouraged.
3. Enjoy every big bite.
4. Occassionally turn to companion to say "dude, ang sarap nito."

(Note: Can be done without companion. But isn't it much better to have someone there to say that line to rather than just breathing heavily with your eyes closed while taking a bite at that juicy burger?=P)

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4. Contentment

Ingredients:

1 Girl
Infinite Patience
N-number of Apologies
Moderate Cheesiness
Occassional Surprises

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Procedure:

1. Meet girl.
2. Test patience.
3. Use cheesiness. But not too much. It might become a joke.
4. Surprise girl occassionally. If cheesiness has become a joke, it will be difficult to surprise girl.
5. Apologize if something goes wrong.
*If "ego" is mixed to the equation, everything blows up.

Warning:
Clinginess leads to complications.

(Note: Lasts about 4 1/2 years.)

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5. Bliss

Ingredients:

1 Canadian

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Procedure:

1. Get Canadian to come back to you.

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6. Release

Ingredients:

1 Car
1 Pack Mentos Gum
1 Traffic-less road.
1 PSP/Music Player
1 FM Transmitter

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Procedure:

1. Plug music player to FM Transmitter.
2. Turn radio on to FM Transmitter signal.
3. Chew gum.
4. Drive on road.

(Note: Look for noisy cars and pseudo-race with them. If you have a not-so-fast car, take them on in light traffic. It will frustrate the hell out of them to your pleasure.=P)

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7. Belongingness

Ingredients:

1 Ice Cream
N-Number of Friends
A dose of Emo
A bunch of Laughter

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Procedure:

1. Go to Icebergs Tomas Morato.
2. Text a couple of friends who could make it.
3. Go emo. But not too long.
4. Share laughter.

(Note: Don't order milkshake. Ever. Unless you're 2 tumblings away from your house.)

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8. Triumph

Ingredients:

Lower Box Tickets
UST Game vs Ateneo*
Unbreakable Voicebox
Tons of Energy
Infinite vocabulary of curses
Basketball knowledge

*It's not as sweet if it's not Ateneo.

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Procedure:

1. Buy tickets.
2. Find your seat in Araneta.
3. Cheer like there's no tomorrow.
4. Curse at refs for bad calls.
5. Curse at Mirza for bad decisions.
6. Curse at Fortuna for turning the ball over.
7. Shout at Ababou to get his act together.
8. Hope for the best.*

*"Best", in this context, is a blowout win vs Ateneo.

(Note: Before cheering "e-yo" or "animo cheers", keep Game 1 of the last championship by UST in mind, AND the 17-point comeback by DLSU just this season. The game is not over til the final buzzer sounds.)

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9. Risk

Ingredients:

1 Table
2 Other players
1 Deck of Cards
about 500pesos
Heart
An irritating laugh
A witty comeback for every insult thrown at you

*Optional:
Wingman

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Procedure:

1. Get players together.
2. Challenge to a game of tong-its.
3. Take chances. Have heart.
4. Take insults and make a comeback.
5. Laugh at random times using irritating laugh that they might not figure out how your cards are turning out.
*If option is taken, laugh and high five with wingman if you get the best or worst card for your hand. Wingman can also shoot insults or scream excitement.

(Note: Best played with family. Para pde utang.)

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10. Recreation

Ingredients:

1 Basketball Court
1 Ball*
Playing clothes
At least 4 other players
An opposing team

*Important! There moments of great genius when all players have everything they need to play except for the ball.=P

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Procedure:

1. Change to playing clothes.
2. Transform to playing self.
3. Play heart out until legs give up.

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11. Brounion

Ingredients:

N-number of Buckets of Beer*
N-number of Bros
Nibbles**
Cellphone

*Can be coffee
**Dispensible if coffee option is taken

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Procedure:

1. Find a good place to drink.
2. Get cellphone to check out who among Bros are available to drink.
3. Order a bucket. Repeat if done.
4. Order nibbles. Preferably something everyone can share.
5. Have a good time.
6. It's time to stop when somebody either:

a. Pukes.
b. Is red all over.
c. Is speaking in English when they normally don't.
d. Picks a fight with the other table/waiter.
e. Is closing his/her eyes.
f. Tells you that the place is closing.

(If coffee option was taken, it's time to stop by 11PM. Of course the coffee option wasn't made to be a Friday/Saturday choice. It could also stop at the declaration of one that he/she needs to take a dump.)

7. You are in deep shit if somebody:

a. gets puked on.
b. apparently has a health condition that prohibits him/her from drinking alcohol
c. is speaking in Spanish.
d. fights back.
e. has to be carried home.
f. actually closes the place.

(Note: Number of Bros doesn't matter. Additionally, Article 22 of the Bro Code states that "There is no law that prohibits a woman from being a Bro.")

(Note #2: Upon informing all bros of whereabouts, the cellphone is best kept in the bag to avoid unnecessary calls, messages, or even just the chance to look at the time.)